A New Season

A new season has dawned. The time of winter has passed and the season of spring has arrived. The coldness and barrenness of winter has departed and the warmth and freshness of spring is now ushered in.

With the dawning of a new season in Melbourne, I also see the beginning of a new season in my life and in my spiritual journey. I have been going through my own period of spiritual winter. For the past few weeks, I have been wrestling with pain, sorrow, hurts, loneliness and despair. I have had a chance to experience God's heart for this world, how He grieves when humanity fails to accomplish what it was originally created for, how painful it is for Him to see mankind bickering and brawling over trivial things in life, how deeply hurting it is for Him to witness purposeful beings being grounded to purposeless machines, image bearers refusing to display His character but choosing instead to follow their own selfish desires ridden with knowledge of good and evil.

I have had a chance to experience that. There was a particular dream that I had that touched me so deeply and truly gave me a glimpse of God's heart for humanity. I wandered across a barren and desolate plain and came across a little girl sitting there, all alone, with sadness, loneliness and despair clearly etched all over her face. Her eyes stared blankly at the large expanse of arid wasteland and evidently she was inattentive to my presence. As I approached her, I realised that she was humming a sad, melancholic, almost inaudible tune; a solemn hymn that cuts to the soul. In her right hand was a piece of worn-out paper, her fingers loosely gripping the old, crumpled sheet. Feeling a sense of strange attraction building up within me, I approached her and sat beside her. Showing sympathy, I asked her what was wrong with her and why she was so lonely and desolate. But she remained silent and without a word. The awfully sad look was still engraved on her visage and the grave, gloomy melody continued to resonate through her lips. She then nudged me to read what was in the piece of paper in her hands, signalling for me to discover the looming mystery that was held by the creased, craggy page. Slowly, I stretched out my hands to receive what was in her small, delicate hands and grasped the sheet that would possibly reveal the secrets of all her pain and suffering. I turned the paper over to the other side and saw clearly what was written on it. Three were scribed with black ink – Faith, Hope, Love. A surge of compassion overwhelmed me. For that split moment in time, my thoughts froze but my heart melted. Without a second thought, I lunged forward and threw my arms around her, wanting to comfort her and perhaps share her cup of grief and pain. Tears streaked down her face as I tried to find words to say. i could not do more, except to remain with her in that desolate and empty place.

When I awoke from my rest, the vividness and intensity of the dream still burned and resonated in my mind. A stream of random, incoherent thoughts surged through my brain, overwhelming all other rational or ordinary thoughts. For me, the girl represented humanity, and the sadness she faced the same kind of despair experienced by all mankind. Behind all the smiley faces, the fake courteousies, the phoney cheers, are so many unresolved hurts and grief, so much well-hidden pain and sorrow, and so much sorrow and despair. The immensity of it was just so overwhelming for me. I could understand now why the Spirit groans and grieves for us. It would be too much for any man to bear alone. Yet, the three words inscribed on the paper – Faith, Hope, Love – reminded me yet of another thing. Mankind did not just need solutions to their problems, or miracle cures for their ailments. No, what man need was a new way of living, filled with faith, hope and love. What I needed to give to others was faith, hope and love. What would ultimately change mankind was faith, hope and love. What would ultimately and decisively break the bondage to the way of life that brings so much death into the world were faith, hope and love. Everything was just so overwhelming. I could not help but weep for this world and for mankind.

For the next few days, I wandered through the desert and battled the harsh winter. I felt so drained and depressed that I could not seem to focus on social interactions. I was disillusioned by the cheery facades that I had to put up in front of people, and sick of the pseudo-appearances that I had to display in my interactions with others. It was just so hard for me to open up to the people around me. And so I bore the pain and the loneliness for several days. Yet, I continued to hold on to the hope that God would turn it into something good. I kept on believing that the situation was not permanent and despite the lack of breakthrough in my spiritual walk with God, that He would somehow see me out of this winter.

It was then that God gave me the opportunity to take the step of faith, to cross the River Jordan from the desert into the Promised Land. A dear friend of mine invited me over to Hope Church to witness God's healing among His people. An evangelist was there for the week praying for the healing of the sick. I hesitated at first because I was sceptical about such public displays of miracles and because I wanted to remain in the comforts of the familiar faces of people at Life* Expedition. Somehow, I came to a point where I was determined not to go to Hope Church due to my perceived discomfort of mingling with people in a different community. As I was prepared to text my friend to tell him that I was not going, a sudden thought came to my mind, prompting me to go to Hope Church. There ignited within me a fresh desire to see what God was doing in other communities, to discover other people's life stories and to share all these stories with my community back at Life* Expedition. Continuing with my internal struggle and battle between two sides, I finally decided to take the step of faith to visit the community at South Kensington, to make the choice to cross the River Jordan.

I was simply amazed at what I saw and experienced at Hope Church. I witnessed healings of those with back pains, blurred visions, hearing problems and semi-paralysis. A lady suffering from severe back pain was cured. Another who had blurred vision had it restored. A boy who suffered from hearing problems received hearing again. God's power and presence was truly among His people. I had the opportunity to exercise my faith as I joined in prayers for God's healing among His people. I dared to believe again in God's healing power and His love for us as humanity. After experiencing death, darkness and depression, there was suddenly a new burst of life from among the ashes, a new infusion of energy and vibrance. There was again, a renewed sense of hope that God is continuing His work among His people and that death and disease would not have the final say in things. God is again ushering new waves of healing for the broken-hearted, restoration for the sick and liberation for the captives. We were not meant to be captives to sin and trepidation, but we were all called to break the bondage of fear and stand in the authority of Christ to bring wholeness and healing into this land. Surely, God is doing that through us!

Aside from the healing miracles, I set out to do what had prompted me to attend the service, to prod into the life stories of the people in the community. I had the opportunity to engage three people in conversations, asking them about their life stories and their steps of faith that they had taken in following Jesus. One story particularly piqued my attention. A sister started off from a Buddhist background back home in Malaysia. When she came to Melbourne, a friend led her to the community. She told me that when she first began to settle down in the community, she was not so keen on knowing about the things of God and was not that interested in Christianity at all. However, her shepherd kept pursuing her, encouraging her to take the Word of God seriously and challenging her to take the step of faith in living out the ways of Christ. He did not give up on her and had the faith to believe that one day she will be used mightily by God. Though her shepherd had returned to Thailand, his patience and persistence have evidently paid off; his toil and labour have born fruit. She is now on fire for God and so passionate about following Jesus that no one would believe that she hailed from a Buddhist background. Indeed, God is doing incredible things not only in her but also among the community of believers, calling them to a new way of living of faith, hope and love. It was one thing to study the theories and learn the ideals, but it was truly a whole different experience to actually witness the movement of God's Spirit in the created order with my own eyes.

Overall, I could see that God is ushering a new season in my life, one that is impregnated with life and saturated with goodness, mercy and love. I have crossed over from my previous spiritual desert into a whole new land that is teemed with promises and brimming with so many exciting things to explore. My eyes have seen the great works of the Almighty and I stand now to bear testimony to His goodness and His love for all of humanity. I now stand as a witness to all His wonderful purposes and promises that He has for mankind and for this earth. And I stand in the love of the Everlasting Father, in the faith of the Mighty Saviour, and the hope of the Wonderful Spirit. And I speak these things to give encouragement to all my brothers and sisters, that they too will have the faith and strength to stand in the land as His representatives as He ushers in a new season of restoration and revival.

So let it be.

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